Jimmy

We Americans love our unsung heroes; we love rooting for the underdog. We do not, however, like being said unsung hero. We want to be rich and famous. Like Tyler Durden says: “We all want to be rock gods and movies stars, but we won’t. We are slowly learning that fact, and we are very pissed off.”

Shift back about two millennia and several dead languages ago to First Samuel, chapter 14. The Philistines are attacking Israel… again. Think of them as the Viking invader scourge of ancient Mesopotamia, except that they were kind of locals. OK, dropping the metaphor now. Anyway, they were at it again.

Saul has just been crowned king and then promptly depose; both times by the very grumpy sounding and rather snarky prophet Samuel. Saul’s son, Jonathan (who I’m pretty sure was NOT gay! Haven’t you people ever heard of bro-mance? Come on!), on the other hand is kicking butt and taking names. Deciding that the Philistines are getting a little too uppity, Jonathan decides to take the battle behind enemy lines.

So where does this whole “unsung hero” business come into play? Right about now, in fact. Jonathan grabs his personal armor-bearer, and tells him that they are going to go and teach those bloody Philistines a thing or two. Imma’ call this kid Jimmy.

Anyway, after Jonathan uses some pretty harsh language to describe the invaders, he asks if Jimmy’s in it with him. Jimmy’s answer?

“Go ahead, I am with you heart and soul.”

Jimmy doesn’t even flinch. He just looks Jon in the eyes and says: “Do it man, I’ve got your back!” A friend indeed.

“OK then,” Jonathan pipes up, “here’s the plan: we walk up to them in broad daylight.”

Jimmy: “So far so good.”

Jonathan: “And then, if they say ‘We’re comin to get you!’ we’re outta luck. But if they say: ‘Come on and get us!’ then that means that God is gonna helps us whoop ‘em for sure!”

They go over, and what do you know? The Philistines yell: “Come on and get us!” So Jimmy and Jon deal it out and slaughter about 20 of the idiots; Jonathan taking the lead… and Jimmy? Well, he watches Jon’s back, just like he said he would and “killed behind him.” Jimmy was taking names too.

The Philistines go crazy. Their entire came starts turning on each other; they are actually now killing each other with their swords. They just got their butts handed to them by some high-schoolers. I can just imagine the looks on their generals’ faces. Jimmy and Jon made Saul’s mop up job a piece of cake. (To eat… not to bake.)

This one goes out to all those Jimmys in the world. You know who you are. You are no longer unsung. I’m rooting for you… and guess what? God is too.

I didn't know they made movies like that anymore

This is an overview/review/my comments on the movie Book of Eli.

WARNING! MAJOR PLOT SPOILERS TO FOLLOW!


Envision this conversation:

Upstanding Hollywood Director: "Hey, I've got this great idea for a movie!"
Warner Brothers: "OK, what is it?"
UHD: "Well, the whole movie takes place in post-apocalyptic America. So basically the whole thing looks like the wild west."
WB: "I like it so far."
UHD: "And there's this guy see, and he is traveling west, he's not sure were exactly, carrying the last copy of the Bible on earth with him."
WB: "I love it! How much do you need?"
UHD: "About $80 million. Oh... and can we have Denzel Washington star as the protagonist?"
WB: "Of course!"

Can you picture it? Neither can I. But something to that effect happened. And now the Hughes brothers' film is roaming around theaters worldwide. Last movie they made was called From Hell. It was released 9 years ago and was about Jack the Ripper. What on earth happened between then and now? I have no clue, but whatever it is, I am grateful for it.

The movie starts simple enough. Denzel Washington is walking across the desert in slow motion, exuding pure coolness. He has a shot gun, a pistol, a backpack, an ipod and what we soon learn is a Bible. Soon enough his ipod runs out of juice and he runs out of water. Nothing for it but to enter the nearest town western style. Denzel finds ipod fix it man, Denzel finds pretty girl, Denzel finds trouble, Denzel finds evil Gary Oldman. Oldman wants to recruit Denzel. He has and eye for talent, and Oldman needs a bit more muscle to keep a hold of his town.

Denzel: "No can do."
Oldman: "Well, at least stay the night."

Denzel isn't given an option. In the middle of the night, Oldman, in an attempt to convince Denzel to stay, sends his daughter (Mila Kunis) to show him a... pleasurable evening. Little does he know Denzel is a man of God. Denzel teaches Mila to pray instead. Mila prays in front of Dad. Big no, no. Now Oldman wants the book.

Denzel: "What book?"

Denzel runs off into the desert. Mila goes with. Oldman chases. Denzel and Mila run into cannibals. They turn out to be nice cannibals. Oldman and co. show up and kill cannibals. Lots of shooting. Oldman gets Mila. "GIVE ME THE BOOK OR I'LL SHOOT HER!" Denzel gives him the book, Oldman shoots Denzel.

The end. Nice bleak, pessemistic ending. Religion doesn't solve problems, it causes them. Right?

Wrong.

Mila hijacks bad guys' car. Blows another one up. Runs off back to Denzel's body. Oldman gives up the chase. He has what he wants. Now he can twist Scripture and use it for his own purposes. Mila finds Denzel up and walking, still heading west. He gets in the car and they finally make it to San Fransisco and to Alcatraz, where another group of survivors are holed up.

Oldman makes it back to town, only to discover that the Bible he has is all in Braille. Denzel is blind. The film ends with Denzel, his wounds washed, dressed in white, dictating the Bible to a scribe, dictating the Scriptures that he has spent the past 30 years reading. And Oldman, dying of his wounds, looking at a Bible he can't read, watching his "kingdom" fall apart. Denzel is entering heaven. Oldman is entering hell.

God will preserve His Scripture and His people, no matter the circumstances. No matter the odds. No matter the cost. He will continue His work, and He WILL complete it!

God will...

Amen!

JSTT