Thou Fiend!

"Peacocks succeed reproductively by winning a kind of beauty contest, in which females 'select' the most attractive males. This explanation for the existence of such otherwise useless features undermined the Creationist assumption that the world has been intelligently designed."
-Michael T. Ghiselin, from the introduction to the Dover Thrift Ed. of Darwin's 'On the Origin of Species'

Apparently, if God exists... He's an engineer... not a poet.

Jimmy

We Americans love our unsung heroes; we love rooting for the underdog. We do not, however, like being said unsung hero. We want to be rich and famous. Like Tyler Durden says: “We all want to be rock gods and movies stars, but we won’t. We are slowly learning that fact, and we are very pissed off.”

Shift back about two millennia and several dead languages ago to First Samuel, chapter 14. The Philistines are attacking Israel… again. Think of them as the Viking invader scourge of ancient Mesopotamia, except that they were kind of locals. OK, dropping the metaphor now. Anyway, they were at it again.

Saul has just been crowned king and then promptly depose; both times by the very grumpy sounding and rather snarky prophet Samuel. Saul’s son, Jonathan (who I’m pretty sure was NOT gay! Haven’t you people ever heard of bro-mance? Come on!), on the other hand is kicking butt and taking names. Deciding that the Philistines are getting a little too uppity, Jonathan decides to take the battle behind enemy lines.

So where does this whole “unsung hero” business come into play? Right about now, in fact. Jonathan grabs his personal armor-bearer, and tells him that they are going to go and teach those bloody Philistines a thing or two. Imma’ call this kid Jimmy.

Anyway, after Jonathan uses some pretty harsh language to describe the invaders, he asks if Jimmy’s in it with him. Jimmy’s answer?

“Go ahead, I am with you heart and soul.”

Jimmy doesn’t even flinch. He just looks Jon in the eyes and says: “Do it man, I’ve got your back!” A friend indeed.

“OK then,” Jonathan pipes up, “here’s the plan: we walk up to them in broad daylight.”

Jimmy: “So far so good.”

Jonathan: “And then, if they say ‘We’re comin to get you!’ we’re outta luck. But if they say: ‘Come on and get us!’ then that means that God is gonna helps us whoop ‘em for sure!”

They go over, and what do you know? The Philistines yell: “Come on and get us!” So Jimmy and Jon deal it out and slaughter about 20 of the idiots; Jonathan taking the lead… and Jimmy? Well, he watches Jon’s back, just like he said he would and “killed behind him.” Jimmy was taking names too.

The Philistines go crazy. Their entire came starts turning on each other; they are actually now killing each other with their swords. They just got their butts handed to them by some high-schoolers. I can just imagine the looks on their generals’ faces. Jimmy and Jon made Saul’s mop up job a piece of cake. (To eat… not to bake.)

This one goes out to all those Jimmys in the world. You know who you are. You are no longer unsung. I’m rooting for you… and guess what? God is too.

The Days

The rain still falls on Wednesdays

And it still pours on Thursdays

It's still gloomy on the days in between

People still die on Sundays

Just because they got drunk on Fridays

And it reminds me of the hurt I've seen

Of all the dour looks on Mondays

We're all just punching the books till Saturday

And we're still here

Yes, we're still here

But the days drag on

And the weather falls

And the time is long

But I think that's the problem

We keep the time

We make sure it rhymes

Why not

BRaKE out????

Why not SmASH A FEW

of the rules

Not destroy the reason

Not create chaos

But live a little... differently

A little bit better than

<---------------------------------BEFORE

Don't cry like the raven

Please stop saying

"Nevermore"

For we will live beyond these DAY

Yes

Yes my friends

We will live

EVERMORE.