A Loss of Confidence

"The authorities were not what they claimed to be. The cool competence and the stoicism were a fraud. The catastrophe of the Suez episode in 1956, when our governing class had tried to behave like imperial rulers in Egypt and had fallen flat upon their faces, had shrunk them and weakened their power to command. The government had sought to abuse (as later governments would also abuse) the semi-sacred incantations of 1940: Egypt's leader, Gamel Abdel Nasser, was a "dictator." Acceding to his demands for control of the Suez Canal was "appeasement." As we have found so often since, these modern villains are not Hitlers, and their ill-armed backward nations are not the Third Reich."

-Peter Hitchens in The Rage Against God, pg 32

An Epic of Epic Epicness, or Why Scott Pilgrim is Better Than 99% of All the Other Comic Books Out There

Last night I went to the midnight release of the sixth and final book in the Scott Pilgrim series, and spent exactly $12.71 on the little digest sized comic book. 250 pages of black and white comic goodness were now in my hands. After an episode with some Scottish bikers on walk back to my apartment (another story for another time), I sat down and devoured the book in a mere 45 minutes. The ending was very satisfying for me; it ended much better than I had hoped… although, after my recent brush with Fullmetal Alchemist, I must admit that I was keeping my expectations pretty low. But after the last page had been read, I started thinking: “what is so great about Scott Pilgrim? Why did I… DO I enjoy his story so much?”

A few weeks ago, I got a call from my dad. We talked about the usual stuff; what am I doing with my life, how’s getting a job going, etc. Then towards the end, he asked me out of the blue (well, perhaps not out of the blue as my profile picture on Facebook at the time was a Scott Pilgrim avatar), why I liked Scott Pilgrim so much. I mumbled some response about how it was just “one of those dumb things.” I suppose that I genuinely thought that at the time; that I thought there was nothing really substantive about Scott Pilgrim, that it was just a goofy story that was fairly harmless, and that there were a lot of worse things I could be doing with my time. However, once I finished the last chapter, appropriately titled “Scott Pilgrim’s Finest Hour,” I began to reassess that opinion.

Scott Pilgrim is a lot more than just a dumb story to me, because he is someone that I relate very closely with. In a lot of ways Scott Pilgrim’s life is my life, except with more Canadians and Kung Fu.

Now, I know that several of you are looking forward to see the movie next month, so let me put down and nice big

(SPOILER WARNING!!!!!!)

The first reason that Scott Pilgrim is so much better than all the other comics out there is very neatly summed up in my roommate’s complaint against most modern pop culture today: its fascination with being “DARK AND GRITTY.” It’s very amusing to me that my roommate gets so angry when any story tries to be all relevant by being dark and, well, gritty. “Why can’t we have happy stories?!” he’ll say. “I want fiction to be diverting, not show me how much life sucks!!” Well, Scott Pilgrim strikes that precious balance between being true to real life, while still being light hearted and hopeful. It doesn’t betray you with a crappy “oh, sorry, life really DOES suck in the end” kind of ending. (I’m lookin’ at YOU Joss Whedon!) But it does touch on heartbreak and what it means to make up for your mistakes.

Now that I’ve gone on and on for a while, I should probably explain the main plot to those of my readers who are not familiar with Scott Pilgrim. Scott Pilgrim lives in Toronto, can’t keep a girlfriend OR a job, and is living on his parents dime in a super crappy apartment with his gay roommate Wallace Wells (with whom he shares a totally platonic relationship). Scott is a lazy bum who regularly sleeps in until noon or later. At one point in the series, Wallace says: “So, I was going to do you a favour and make dinner, but it appears that all you have in the house is ramen noodles and cereal.” To which Scott mumbles: “…..the EconOmY…..”

So while Scott was indeed a loser, from book one I felt like we were best of friends and already knew each other; a chemistry between character and reader that most authors spend years perfecting.

Halfway though the first book, Scott Pilgrim meets Ramona Victoria Flowers, the American ninja delivery girl. Ramona is amazing and mysterious and, well, dangerous. Scott is toast. After discovering that Ramona works as a delivery girl for Amazon.ca, Scott orders something and waits. Upon delivering his package, Scott asks Ramona out on a date. Although a little creeped out, Ramona accepts. But little does Scott know the baggage Ramona is carrying. He soon finds out that in order for him and Ramona to find their happily-ever-after, he must defeat her seven evil exes in hand to hand combat.

Suddenly what started as a rather funny romantic comedy turns into a wacky blend of Friends, Mario Brothers, manga and Street Fighter. A discussion about someone’s feelings will be interrupted by a robot attack, a party will be crashed by a boss battle, a walk down main street will erupt into a sword fight.

This line between the mundane and the fantastical is explained by author Bryan Lee O’Malley: “ It's (what actually happened in the story) just not what he (Scott Pilgrim) thought. It's that his own narration of his own life is unreliable to himself, and he just was tricking himself. I think we all do that.” (For the rest of the interview, click here) It’s revealed that most of the story is what Scott Pilgrim THINKS is going on around him, not necessarily what is ACTUALLY happening.

But by the end of book 5, things are not going well for Scott by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, the books ends with the words “GAME OVER” scrawled across the page. Ramona has left him, his friends are gone, and the final villain seems nearly impossible to defeat. After the all ups and downs of the past four books, Scott is right back where he started: alone, jobless and depressed. Except this times it’s worse, because he’s tasted a bit of what it’s like to be happy, and he doesn’t know how to get back there.

Book six opens with that depression still present. In fact, Scott is dreaming again (he does a lot of that), but this time, instead of dreaming about Zelda and being Link, he dreams that all his ex-girlfriends turn into monsters and try to eat him. Yeah, Scott is having a tough time. Lost and confused, Scott wanders around bumping into his old friends and has to deal with his past mistakes; mistakes that up until this point in the series he has not only ignored, but made up fictions about in order to forget how things actually happened. How many of us have done the exact same thing? Painting someone else as the villain, so that we don’t have to admit that we were the ones who screwed up.

At the same time, it is revealed that Ramona is dealing with her own demons and insecurities. She, unlike Scott, is SO stuck in her past and her own mistakes that it’s crippling her. She doesn’t feel like she even deserves Scott, who is the biggest loser known to mankind.

Finally, through a weird chain of events involving a desert, an extra life, a nightclub, a purse and a katana, Scott and Ramona end up alone together in a netherworld. They finally come to terms with their mistakes, apologize and forgive each other, before going back to the real world to defeat the last boss, Gideon.

At the very end, after all the loose ends have been tied up, Scott and Ramona are left looking at each other.

“So,” Scott says.

Ramona: “So?”

“So… we try again.”

And with that, they dive off into the deep unknown.

In the end, Scott Pilgrim isn’t a dumb story after all. It’s is a classic story: it’s the story of winning the girl, fighting your demons, learning from your mistakes, asking for forgiveness, and letting the power of true love, agape love, conquer all.

It’s a story we can all relate to. It’s the story of becoming an adult.

Capital

Politics scare me… so does the internet, put them together and what have you got? Bibity-bobity-bad-news.

Explanation: I don’t remember WHY I did this, but for some reason I decided to “become a fan” of “being conservative” on Facebook. Yes, I realize now how horrid that sentence sounds. I cringe at the thought of having to proof read this rant because that means I will have to reread that sentence. I am tempted to blame Obama, but that’s cheap. I jump to extremes, so I suppose that is the best explanation. I “fanned” something as an over reaction, or perhaps because they had some kind of ad or post that resonated with me.

See, this is one of the enormous dangers of modern politics: one side will scare the willies out of you, but then the other side (who are just as scary) tries to mask their scariness by appealing to your fear of the other side. They both do this, so that those poor souls who are NOT fanatically loyal to one side or the other are left flip-flopping in between like some carp drying up in the sun, trying desperately to get back to the cool of the lake.

Now, for those of you who are familiar with the Facebook interface, I’m sure you have seen the “polls for science” that some of the fan pages and Facebook itself post. Well, the other day “Being Conservative” posts this:

The recent story about a homeless man braving a fierce storm to save an American Flag in distress got us thinking about how some others treat the flag. Please vote in the poll below.

Should burning the American flag be a crime?
a) Yes
b) No
c) Other

Allow me to fill in the “other” section:

What the heck!?!?!? Notice the spin that is put on this, you cannot answer this question negatively without feeling like a complete jerk. This is totally slanted, this is called sophistry… this is called “not being able to think for yourself.” Notice the usage of the words “braving,” “fierce storm,” and “distress.” This is no mere homeless man here, this is the arch angel Michael in disguise protecting the holy effigy of America!

Sarcasm aside, my point is this: protecting the flag with this kind of fanaticism is a fine practice if America is your god. You SHOULD worship and protect the honor of your gods. That’s the way we humans are wired. Question science? You’re a heretic. Blaspheme Allah? You get run through with a scimitar. Burn the flag? You are going to be stoned. This is the normal order of things; it happens all the time. I get all offended if someone insults my favorite song… so yeah, I have issues to sort out too.

So no, we should not be surprised at these kinds of reactions. Everyone needs something to worship, step on it and they will kill you. But this brings me to a very important theological point about Christianity. Many seculars believe that Christians embracing both the commands to not murder and to kill those who DO murder or rape or abuse other humans is nonsensical. Ah contrar, frater!

Based on the principle I already mentioned, it makes PERFECT sense. See, one of the basic tenants of Christianity is that we (humans) are created in God’s image, a gift that was not bestowed on any other creature (which is why PETA elevating animals above humans is ridiculous). As such, humans are made in the very image of the God I serve as a Christian, and as such, they are to be held in the highest respect and honor. Killing or raping and hurting a fellow human is to me what burning a flag is to a patriot, or insulting Darwin is to an Evolutionist, or denouncing Allah is to a Muslim. It is a capital offence, it is TOTALLY deserving of death. You have just defaced the greatest image in existence. Your death is the only option.

That doesn’t make this easy. Killing another human, even if they deserve it should NEVER be taken lightly. And killing animals or plants for the heck of it is akin to spitting on a painting by a great artist. I cringe when I see a fish flopping in the bottom of a boat or find a boy about to stomp on a bug. I am not advocating random acts of violence, I am merely trying to shed a little light.

Bubba Ho-Tep

MPAA rating: R for some violence, uses of the “f” word, and some awkward moments
Canadian rating: 14A
My rating: ****1/2 out of *****
Style: ****
Writing: *****
Awkward parts: ****
Message: *****




JFK and Elvis didn’t die. JFK just went through massive plastic surgeries and is now black and has a brain made of “mostly sand.” Elvis switched places with a guy named Sebastian Haff, one of his impersonators, only to have the real Haff who was then pretending to be Elvis die of drug overdose. Anyway, for some reason JFK and Elvis end up in the same nursing home in the middle of nowhere Mud Creek, Texas. Not only that, but there is a crazy, redneck, cowboy boot wearin’ mummy on the loose. No, this is not one of those movies I would have just picked up on my own; no matter how much you may think me the type.

The story starts with Elvis’ roommate dying and the man’s daughter coming to collect his things. She picks up her father’s Purple Heart and old photos of him coming back from war and is about to throw them away, when Elvis asks if he can have them. She shrugs and hands them over… they mean nothing to her. As she leaves, Elvis asks: why? Why didn’t she take better care of him?

“I didn’t have the money to,” she explains halfheartedly.

“You coulda visited. They don’t charge for that,” Elvis quips.

“Don’t lecture me.”

The whole movie switches between totally nutso craziness and this hard-hitting commentary on how we treat our elders as easily as turn it’s head from left to right. It just… works. It works really well. I felt horrified by the mummy and by our culture’s abuse of the elderly at the same time. I suddenly wanted to go treasure hunting with and/or visit a nursing home.

Another large theme of the film is how Elvis and JFK wish they had been better to their families and been more honorable in their lives. When the mummy shows up, they are given a chance to redeem themselves and take the adventure that they both craved, but never had. This is mostly manifested through Elvis’ long narration speeches about how he wished he had treated his family right.

(SPOILER ALERT)

Finally, the grand finale comes about at the perfect time. JFK has deduced that the nursing home is the perfect place for mummy to haunt, because it needs to eat souls to survive, and “no one would care if a few more elders dropped off.” So Elvis and JFK grab their walker and wheelchair respectively, a big tank of propane, some matches and go off to kick some undead.

The mummy chokes JFK to death, but doesn’t get his soul. Then in an awesome scene, Elvis rams the mummy and blowtorches him to smithereens. But before the end, the mummy deals some serious damage to Elvis, who is left by the creek looking back on all that has happened.

“He didn’t get my soul. I’ve still got my soul. It’s all mine,” Elvis sighs, relived. Finally he looks up at the sky, and for some reason the stars align and spell out the only thing Elvis needs to hear:

“All is well.”

“Thank ya… thank ya very mu…”

All is well; your soul is intact. How often do we need to hear those very words? I know this is a strange film to find the message of “well done, my good and faithful servant.” But that’s what I heard. Those are the words I long to hear when my life is coming to an end and I am looking back on all of my adventures. And I am so glad that some films find them worth saying as well.

A Tale to Tell

I've read a lot of stories in my day. Probably a lot more than most other 21 year old guys; but I never really started evaluating them until now. I mean, I could say "I like this story," or "I really didn't enjoy that one," but I would be hard pressed to tell you why. I never really evaluated those kinds of things. At least, I never did until I started thinking in terms of the "theology of story."

I came across the idea in my first year of college. It was introduced to me by some folks who shall remain nameless, because I respect them so much. If there is one thing my writing has taught me, it's that it is better to be safe than sorry. I don't want them to be held responsible for the stupid stuff I say. But if the following does sound familiar, you probably already know the men who introduced this idea to me in the first place.

Anyway, freshman year I was still mulling over the idea of how God is in complete control of the universe, and yet... man is still responsible for what he does and will be judged for it. Doesn't make a lot of sense to your average Christian, let alone the average atheist. For the few years before this whole new story idea popped up, I just took it as one of those "secret things" of God; a paradox that I simply needed to embrace and trust was true.

Then the theology of story hit me like a ton of bricks: was the Bard responsible for all the murders in Hamlet? Should he have been executed for writing that play? Of course not, he's the writer! His job was to tell a story and get a point across. Uncultured swine that I am, I could not tell you what the point of Hamlet is, but I'm sure Shakespeare had one in mind.

So, Shakespeare didn't have any problem writing sin and murder and evil characters in his plays, but did that make the characters in the play any less evil? Not at all! The story still judged them for what they did. There was still justice in the story, there was humor, and tears and pain and good plotting.

Now I ask, what is God? WHO is God?? He is the master Storyteller, of course. He is writing the best story of all time. A story where, as one book I read put it: "soldiers and spacemen, cowboys and ninjas, pirates and robots all really do exist!" A story that spans MILLENNIA! A tale of revenge, romance, justice, laughter, epic battle scenes, sweeping adventures, evil villains, and so, so, so much more! It is the most epic tale ever told. Why is there sin and death and evil? Because it makes for a good story. Because God must defeat it. Does the existence of something to be vanquished make God Himself evil? No! It makes Him a good story teller. Who would want to read a story with no villain? I know I wouldn't. If there was no challenge to overcome, if there was no struggle... then the victory at the end would be cheap, it would be meaningless. There would be little glory in it.

And for what did God create everything? He made it for His glory. Telling the most epic story of all time was the best way He saw fit to bring Himself glory. What is our job? As the creed says "to glorify God, and to enjoy Him forever." And he chose to do that with a story.

Now that I know this, I find that I know why and how to appreciate human stories: because they are little pictures; little imitations of the bigger story. If it accurately depicts the grand tale, although it is more like a crayon drawing on God's cosmic fridge, it is a good story. Human creations that do NOT reflect God's story are lies, and are not to be held up as good representations of art.

An example perhaps? God says "dog." A dog appears. I draw a brown splotch with four leg looking things. God says: "Well done!" Alan Moore, however, draws a black mess with lightning blots and lots of death and blood. God says: "Badly done!"

We both drew messes, there is no mistake in that. But God sees through the mess into our hearts, He sees what we see, and He does not mistake that for something else. He knows if we are viewing His story correctly. He is also the one who gives us the eyes to see the story, cuz... well, we're the characters He's writing. We can only break the fourth wall if he writes us that way.

One last parting thought: the best human depiction of God's story I have yet seen is Les Miserables. It is a beautiful tale and includes nearly every aspect of God's world in it: revenge, grace, redemption, trust, beauty, love and justice. But best of all, it ends in a wedding.

Till next time,
JSTT

Interrupted

I was all settled down to write a nice essay extolling the wonders of Quentin Tarantino’s film making when I was very rudely interrupted by a great big mess in my apartment that resulted in a metric crap ton of laundry and a very angry Josiah.

Long story short, I ended up at the laundry mat at 11:00pm with a lot of laundry, a Bible, some Skittles and a bad attitude. Then it suddenly dawned on me: this is where I should have been the whole time. God had just resorted to some… unconventional means to get me where He wanted me.

Then all I found I could say was “speak Lord. Your servant is listening.”

Don’t worry, I may still assault you all with that Tarantino essay sometime.

JSTT

Missing the Obvious

Sometimes I'm not the only one who is extremely moronic. To be sure, I have shown my stupid stripes on many an occasion, but every once in a great while, I am outdone. And boy is it beautiful!

As most of you know (and if you didn't, now you do) I turned 21 about a month ago. I've been enjoying the tastes of stout, hard cider and other things ever since. Anyway, I was walking around the grocery store the other day looking for milk and something for dinner, when I noticed an amber ale called "Shock Top." The label intrigued me, so I picked up a case to look at more closely. Wonder or wonders, it was a CITRUS ale! I am a nut for orange juice and all other kinds of citrus things, so I immediately took the case over to the counter.

The lady checking me out (and yes, I know how creepy that sounds), was one of those ladies who calls anyone even remotely younger that she is "darling." So after she had rung up all my quote/unquote "normal" items, I was assaulted with "May I see your I.D., darling?" I grimaced and handed over my drivers license.

Now, for some reason my North Carolina driver's license confuses the heck out most Idahoans. It makes their heads kind of explode and leaves them going: "ddaaaahhhdududududdaaaaa" for about 15 seconds before I explain how it works. After watching her stumble over my identification for a few moments, I pointed out the big red box right by the picture that says:

"TURNS 21 ON JUNE 4, 2010"

It's in kinda big letters, and hard to miss if you're really looking. Anyway, she finally decided that I really WAS old enough to buy beer, and punched in my birthday.

Now, there is something else that you must know about buying alcohol from grocery stores: it's pretty much a fail proof system. There is no way that the computer will let you sell to a minor. You have to deliberately screw with the system to sell to someone under 21: give the computer a false date, disable the "WILL NOT SELL TO MINOR" system, or something very similar. If you do that, in my opinion, you DESERVE to get caught.

Anyway, she punched in my birthday, and the computer says it won't sell to me and cancels the whole transaction. "HA! Now you can't buy milk EITHER!" I almost hear the computer laugh manically. The lady looks at my I.D., at the computer and then back at me. "This is weird."

She punches the date into the computer two more times with the same result. Then she calls over one of the girls working in the same section of the store and has her punch it in. Same thing. They start laughing and wondering what the heck is going on. At this point, someone walks up to the counter and asks: "Can I get some help over here?"

The lady who first tried to take my order looks over and says sarcastically: "No, sorry."

At first I was a little shocked, but then when the other women who was asking for help said: "Wow, service here SUCKS!" I looked a little closer and noticed that they were sisters. I breathed a little sigh of relief. I had no desire to be the cause of contention among Safeway staff and customers.

Finally, the lady got fed up with the whole thing and just punched in her birthday. I made a joke to let the women behind the counter know that I was in no way put out by the whole ordeal, and headed out to my car.

Suddenly, as I was unlocking the great red behemoth, it struck me: they had been putting in the wrong date the entire time! The text on my I.D. had said, "turns 21 on June 4, 2010." So like any lazy human who doesn't want to think too hard, they put the date into the computer... the date that they had read: 06/04/2010. Of course, the computer, smarter than your average human, had said: "No WAY I'm selling to a 1 month old! How the heck is he even trying to buy groceries?!?"

I laughed all the way home, taking comfort in the thought that I am not the only one who makes dumb mistakes like that.

JSTT

Hay un amigo en mi!

Ok, so with the release of every movie now-a-days there is the release of the movie soundtrack. Toy Story 3's soundtrack just came out, and you will never believe what they did with it:

Rapid Heart Beat

Things are happening so quickly. I have only one week left in North Carolina, then I'm headed back to Cleveland... and then Idaho. This month has gone by like a flash. Detailing all the little things that happen would be nigh impossible... so I will do what I do best: give you bullet points. This will also give you, the reader, the sense that things and ideas are flying by extremely fast. So, in the end, we both win. I get to be lazy, and still achieve the effect I desire in my writing. Not that this is a good habit to get into.

-Getting called in for jury duty a week before you leave a town and never intend to return... at least not for a long, long time. Go ahead North Carolina, put out a warrant for my arrest! (I am totally kidding by the way. I just submitted my reason for absence to the judge. I have no desire to be held in contempt of the court.)

-If your mother is having miniature heart attacks... clean the house. This will do wonders for her nerves and will most likely cure all her ills. Hugs on top of this are always a plus.

-I have found yet another avenue to explore in the realm of career options: greeting card writer. Not only will I be the perfect man for the job after finished school, (anyone want Plato references in their thank you cards?) but the headquarters of American Greetings is in Cleveland of all places! Booyah!

-Greenstorm Film is starting back up again in full force. After completing and releasing a rather spiffy music video and receiving many accolades about said video, I received a script from a very good friend of mine. Who was it? What is it? I will say no more. I'll leave you in suspense.

Ok, there's a doctor's appointment I have to get to.
Cheers and laterness and stuff,
JSTT

Not so Glamorous

We all have something to fight for. Everyday, every morning, every night. There are some fights that change from day to day. A job for example may be difficult and you have to overcome the daily challenges that you face there. But jobs often change. One fight that we must fight everyday that we are alive is ourselves. Our own sinful natures that rear their heads at the most inconvenient times.

More often than not we simply want to give up that fight; the fight against self. But as a guy I know that us guys always want something to fight for. That can often take shape in odd ways. One of the most notable ways in modern American culture is by playing video games.

"Huh? What?"

Let me explain. The biggest feature of video game advertised to guys my age are the violent/shoot-em-up games. Halo of course is a wonderful example of this. The Doom games a generation before. Space Invaders the generation before that. Lots of shooting, explosions and flying bits of.... stuff. We're fighting off terrorists, aliens, zombies and demons from hell. And when the women in our lives whine and complain about how we are not fulfilling our duties as men we are confused. "We're fighting off armies for you, don't you see? Can't you understand?"

No, they don't. Because we are fighting for the wrong thing. As men, we are wired to fight. But because we are also wired for laziness, we often fight for the wrong thing; the thing that requires a minimal sacrifice from ourselves. Either that or after realizing that we are fighters, we target the wrong thing as the enemy. Instead of trying to fight the sin nature hidden in the deep dark corners of ourselves, we naturally assume that we ourselves could NEVER be the problem and that it must be those around us: the Church, our parents, the boss, the teacher, the Man, God.

It's time we all reprioritized. We want glorious, glamorous battles to fight. Like the dudes in the video games who can take on hoards of enemy monsters and come our unscathed. There in lies the other thing we long for, a fight without pain or sacrifice. I am very sorry, but that is not possible. There is often very little glamour in the battles we fight. Not only that, but there is blood spilt along the trail, there are broken bones and gnashing of teeth.

I say this as much for my benefit as for your's. But one last thing: we do not fight this fight on our own strength. We fight with the fists of God, the wounds of Christ, and the assurance of the Holy Spirit. And the Trinity does NOT grow weary.

JSTT

The Future... Is On a Boat!

Apologies for my absence when I explicitly said that I would be back soon; although I suppose that five days IS much shorter than two months. I would be lying if I said that I was busy. I am still as of yet unemployed. And no, I'm not bragging. A steady job would be wonderful right about now.

But as my talents are limited t0 telling stories, writing essays, washing dishes and beating things with sticks, my job opportunities are sadly limited.

But I am doing my best to keep occupied and productive. Right now I am writing an as-of-yet-to-be-fully-developed novel with my friend Pete, who writes random bits of silliness on his respective blog here.

We've both been working on this story in our when-we-get-around-to-it time. Which reminds me, my mother actually DOES have a round Tuit.

Getting focused again, here is a bit of the story we are writing, and I am now sharing with you. Oh, and it really does have to do with a boat.

"A boat?"

"Yes... a boat," said Zeb.

"OK, when you said 'boat,' I assumed that you meant a nice boat. A proper ship with wings and jets and... you know... SPACE worthy. Not the whole..." Quint waved his hands in the air gesturing to the entire boat. Zeb gave bemused laugh.

"Yes, yes," he chortled patranizingly. "Sail, keel, deck, ropes, the whole package deal. Missing a proper poop deck sadly." The joke was entirely lost on Quint who continued to stare at the boat as if he had never seen such a thing before. In fact, this was not far from the truth. Quint had not seen a sea ship since he had been back on earth, and that had been part of a collection some rich fellow had. The thing had hardly been sea worthy. Quint knew that he certainly wouldn't have set sail in the thing. What frightened him the most was that the object that Zeb now preposed that they travel in was in even WORSE condition than the one he had seen in a collector's museum. This was not good.

"Care to explain?"

"Explain what?" Zeb countered, as if he went on pleasure cruises in the thing on a regular basis. "Look, I had to get this on the sly. I'm in no position to acquire an entire space craft in the time we had. And even if I HAD had the time, I don't have those kinds of assets. This will do fine. You just need to know where the leeches are and avoid the squalls."

"But... but..." Quint could no longer think in anything other than conjunctions and negations.

Hidden Treasures

It is one of great joys in life to dig up bits and pieces of odds and ends and bits and bobs. Conjunctions for example.

But in all seriousness. I find it very gratifying to introduce someone to a piece of art or fiction, and to watch them fall in love with it. A good example of this recently was introducing my friend Jeremy to the comic books series "Scott Pilgrim." It is a very hard comic to describe, but I have heard others describe it thus: as a cross between Say Anything (the movie, not the band), Kill Bill and Mario. I would also add in every anime you've ever seen, and a healthy helping of Street Fighter.

More recently, Scott Pilgrim has been turned into a film by Edger Wright, the renowned British director behind "Shaun of the Dead" and "Hot Fuzz." He is not the only one working on it however, so is Bill Pope... the cinematographer for not only The Matrix films, but all of the Spider-Man trilogy. I am extremely excited about this one. If you aren't enthused yet, watch the new trailer:

I'll be back with more on character sketches and comics soon. In the mean time enjoy the trailer!

JSTT

June 2010

I just signed a lot of paper work. Attorneys are submitting things to writing. Large sums of money are being pushed around. They are taking care of my earth dollars. I am grateful to them.

Tomorrow I will magically become responsible enough to drink alcohol. Foolish, silly bureaucrats. They makes me laugh.

There will be many words to come about airplanes and movies and beauty and comics and women folk soon to come.

Sorry for my absence. I appreciate your patients. The only thing under construction are my thoughts.

JSTT

Epic Adventures

So, I think that this should become a regular series, as crazy things are happening to me more and more often. The car flip, getting run over by a crazy Irishman at a punk rock concert, etc... But more often than not, these adventures take place with some very special friends of mine: Noah Allsup, Pete Nyhus and Gary Stedman.

Anyway, I decided that since we got this Good Friday off, we should go see a movie. I invited basically everyone that I knew in town... Pete, Gary and Noah were the only three that gave me a positive response. Yes, you all missed out on our epic adventure. Think on your sins.

Which movie, you ask? "How to Train Your Dragon." I mentioned it earlier, horrible title... and now I can say from personal experience: totally cool movie.

Problem: it's not playing in our town. The local theater is closed for remodeling, and the theater in the next state (which conveniently is only 4 miles away) decided to oust Dragon so that they could begin playing the remake of "Clash of the Titans," which appears to be the exact opposite of Dragon, super cool title, hopelessly lame movie. But as one of my friends mentioned after seeing the trailer for it said: "That looks really ridiculous... but I feel that as a man... I have to see it." Ah yes, American culture defines gender lines again!!!! Hazzah!!! But I digress...

So after sleeping in and missing breakfast, I call Gary. Pete. is. asleep. I would have been too if it wasn't for my overreactive sense of.... I have no idea what I'm taking about. Let's fast-forward a bit.

We're driving to Lewiston (the only theater for about 57.3 miles around playing the film), only to have it start snowing on the way there. Yes, snowing. It is April 2.... and it is snowing. Did I mention that it was SNOWING?????

But we are in luck, as Lewiston is about 1000 ft closer to sea level than Moscow is. Taking the switchbacks down the mountain side the snow quickly turns to slush and then to rain. When we finally reach the bottom, it's as if we've entered an entirely different hemisphere.

The movie itself was great. Tons of fun, even if you don't see it in 3D. The music, the effects... the acting even. Sometimes I forgot that I was watching pixels and not real people. That is the true mark of a talented director, he can turn ANY medium and create something beautiful out of it. Finally, a Gerard Butler movie that is... um.... kid friendly!! Anyway, if you can forgive the title, I highly recommend it to all of you from about 5 to 93.

We stop at a hole in the wall burger place called Sharp's Burgers... only found in Lewiston/Clarkston, where we proceeded to just stand in front of the counter, staring at the menu and freaking out the management.

"So, are we just going to stand here being awkward?"
Pete: "You can. I am going to stand here and be awesome."
Noah: "Wait.... what???"
Gary: "Well, I'm going to order something."
Josiah: "Wait a second. You can buy a HALIBUT?!?!?"

The restaurant was where most of the following quote and what-not came about. There seems to be something explosive combustible about putting the four of us in the same room. (Welcome to the club for redundancy club.) Pete, Noah, and I are all extremely loud, Gary, although he doesn't say much, usually laughs in approval at our jokes. Noah usually plays the bothered, offended yet jovial hot-head. "You have got to be KIDDING MEEEEE!!!!!"
Pete... Pete's kind of like his comic foil, telling non-sequiturs as if they were the most common thing in the world, and spouting nonsense as if it were fact. I play the straight man... the one who usually instigates the awkward, odd, and sometimes hilarious conversation topics. Gary is our laugh track.

But as we ascended out of the Snake River valley, nothing could have prepared us for what lay ahead. The fields at the top of the gorge were almost completely white! The yellow sign posts were frozen over, looking like something you might find on a movie poster with the tag line: "When hell freezes over!"

At that point, Gary decided to crack a joke: "It's like God's saying: 'Now it's spring time... oops. NOT!!!!"

My friends are awesome.
JSTT



Quotes:
-Josiah (reading a sign): "It's scout cookie season: March 11th to April... something."
-Pete: "That would explain the dancing cookies"

(arguing about taking school work into a movie theater)
Gary: "You know, when I they were first fighting the dragons, all I could think of was 'hey, he is surviving their attacks by using induction."
Noah (staring at Gary in disbelief): "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! It's a HOLIDAY!!!!"
Gary: "What? You brought Darwin along."
Noah: "Yes, but I left him in the CAAARRRR!!!!"
Pete: "It would have been funny to take him into the movie theater. 'I don't understand this. Could you tell me what's going on? Wait, they're dragons. How do you explain THAT you bearded kook!!!"

Thou Fiend!

"Peacocks succeed reproductively by winning a kind of beauty contest, in which females 'select' the most attractive males. This explanation for the existence of such otherwise useless features undermined the Creationist assumption that the world has been intelligently designed."
-Michael T. Ghiselin, from the introduction to the Dover Thrift Ed. of Darwin's 'On the Origin of Species'

Apparently, if God exists... He's an engineer... not a poet.

Jimmy

We Americans love our unsung heroes; we love rooting for the underdog. We do not, however, like being said unsung hero. We want to be rich and famous. Like Tyler Durden says: “We all want to be rock gods and movies stars, but we won’t. We are slowly learning that fact, and we are very pissed off.”

Shift back about two millennia and several dead languages ago to First Samuel, chapter 14. The Philistines are attacking Israel… again. Think of them as the Viking invader scourge of ancient Mesopotamia, except that they were kind of locals. OK, dropping the metaphor now. Anyway, they were at it again.

Saul has just been crowned king and then promptly depose; both times by the very grumpy sounding and rather snarky prophet Samuel. Saul’s son, Jonathan (who I’m pretty sure was NOT gay! Haven’t you people ever heard of bro-mance? Come on!), on the other hand is kicking butt and taking names. Deciding that the Philistines are getting a little too uppity, Jonathan decides to take the battle behind enemy lines.

So where does this whole “unsung hero” business come into play? Right about now, in fact. Jonathan grabs his personal armor-bearer, and tells him that they are going to go and teach those bloody Philistines a thing or two. Imma’ call this kid Jimmy.

Anyway, after Jonathan uses some pretty harsh language to describe the invaders, he asks if Jimmy’s in it with him. Jimmy’s answer?

“Go ahead, I am with you heart and soul.”

Jimmy doesn’t even flinch. He just looks Jon in the eyes and says: “Do it man, I’ve got your back!” A friend indeed.

“OK then,” Jonathan pipes up, “here’s the plan: we walk up to them in broad daylight.”

Jimmy: “So far so good.”

Jonathan: “And then, if they say ‘We’re comin to get you!’ we’re outta luck. But if they say: ‘Come on and get us!’ then that means that God is gonna helps us whoop ‘em for sure!”

They go over, and what do you know? The Philistines yell: “Come on and get us!” So Jimmy and Jon deal it out and slaughter about 20 of the idiots; Jonathan taking the lead… and Jimmy? Well, he watches Jon’s back, just like he said he would and “killed behind him.” Jimmy was taking names too.

The Philistines go crazy. Their entire came starts turning on each other; they are actually now killing each other with their swords. They just got their butts handed to them by some high-schoolers. I can just imagine the looks on their generals’ faces. Jimmy and Jon made Saul’s mop up job a piece of cake. (To eat… not to bake.)

This one goes out to all those Jimmys in the world. You know who you are. You are no longer unsung. I’m rooting for you… and guess what? God is too.

The Days

The rain still falls on Wednesdays

And it still pours on Thursdays

It's still gloomy on the days in between

People still die on Sundays

Just because they got drunk on Fridays

And it reminds me of the hurt I've seen

Of all the dour looks on Mondays

We're all just punching the books till Saturday

And we're still here

Yes, we're still here

But the days drag on

And the weather falls

And the time is long

But I think that's the problem

We keep the time

We make sure it rhymes

Why not

BRaKE out????

Why not SmASH A FEW

of the rules

Not destroy the reason

Not create chaos

But live a little... differently

A little bit better than

<---------------------------------BEFORE

Don't cry like the raven

Please stop saying

"Nevermore"

For we will live beyond these DAY

Yes

Yes my friends

We will live

EVERMORE.

Connotation, Definition and ect.

I'll post this on my blog and facebook so that it won't be missed.

So, I have always seemed to have this problem. I like using words that I don't understand. It's been that way since I was very small. Once, after saying something funny as a boy of about 6, a family friend told me: "Josiah, I bet you'll grow up to be a comedian." To which I replied: "But I'm already a Canadian!"

Usually this was only a problem with big words like "discombobulated, penultimate" and my personal favorite: "disraught" (a cross between the word "distraught" and the phrase "what hath thou wrought?") "Fired," although a very short word, seems to be causing me a bit of trouble at the moment. I thought I knew what it meant, but I guess still I misunderstood. I'm good at that.

I should be familiar enough with this problem just from my own friends' slips of phrase. Recently, a friend (who shall remain unnamed) was rather disraught (hee, hee, hee) and said he was wondering: "where do God and I stand?" I was rather shocked.

"Dude, whoa! Are you OK? Do you even know what that means?"

He said that he did, but his definition was most certainly NOT mine. I told him: "Ok, this is what I think of when I hear that phrase. Example, if some girl that I was dating or engaged to or whatever came up to me and said: 'Josiah, where do we stand now,' I would be preparing for the end of the relationship."

My friend was shocked: "No, no, no! That's not what I meant at all!" And then he went on to explain that he was just having a hard time struggling with sin and spiritual depression. Well, who doesn't have a down moment now and then? But doubting your faith in God (which is what I took him to mean) is something else entirely!

So... let me define my terms. I suppose by everyone else's definition, I was not "fired." I was not even a full employee yet. I was still in a three week period of paid training. At the end of those three weeks me and my boss had a little heart to heart. I am a big picture kind of guy, working at a winery requires that one be constantly consumed with the details, making it a full priority. I could not afford to do that. I have enough details in my head with Latin subjunctives and the mitochondria of animal cells. I left on good terms, no hostility, no anger... just a mutual realization that that wasn't where I should have been.

I'm an odd bat. I have strange definitions sometimes. I still think that spring starts in February, summer in May, autumn in August and winter in November. Often... VERY often, I must clarify and correct myself. Thanks for listening.

God bless your weekend,

JSTT

The Rain

Hello old friend

Constant

Steady

Leaving blood-like trails on the dirt stains of a crimson mini-van

Don't leave yet

Stay here

Wash me clean

Wash us all

Wash us all away

I'll rejoice in others' contentment

Just don't leave

Don't Look Away

Sit down on the porch

Ignore the sunset

Ignore the raspberry sorbet bleeding over the grassy knolls

Go ahead

I won't mind

But I can't look away

I can't be blind

I look and look and look

And then I find

What I was searching so long for

But all you've found is something to hate and abhor

Turn away if you must

Burn the fire to dust

To it you will return

But I will move on

Long after you've met your end

I'll be following a tale that will never end

I'll go on

I'll go on

To discover a kingdom that will be the death of me

It will be my salvation

It will be my glory

I wish I could open your eyes so you could see it

But I can't do that

You have to feel it

I'm praying He'll open your eyes

That you'll be freed from all your lies

The damp dark cage you built

The sword you plunged into your chest

Up to the hilt

Pull it out

Wipe off the blood

Get washed away in the flood

Of the world I know

Of the life I see

Of what we could one day be

Yet... Not At All

I could be pretentious

Oh, I could do it oh so well

I could take the blame for all your pain

And tell you I cracked the Liberty Bell

Just hypothesizing

It's so close to justifying

Yet not at all

Steeped it a quagmire of pop culture fizz

I believe this makes me eclectic

Perhaps even eccentric

Yet not at all

I down pounds of processed sugar everyday

I say it's for a reason

The feeling

That I get when I actually ingest healthy food makes it all worth it

Yet not at all

I consume a steady diet of socially acceptable violence

In the form of words and pixels

Socially acceptable being key phrase

Yet not at all

I think that I have something relevant to say

Something that will affect you

Perhaps radically change your perspective on life

What did I say about being pretentious?

Yet not at all

Am I defined by this hopeless quest for self-gratification and validation?

Am I compelled to be this quivering mess of reaching, grasping introspection?

Am I finished?

No, not at all

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow

Praise Him all creatures here below

Praise Him above ye heavenly host

Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost

And that is all

Soapbox

Set the box on the corner

Stand up, a global amphitheater

A podium, a church, a strip bar

The communists and optimists and misogynists congregate

We get together and conjugate

We promote hope and spread the hate

Striving, struggling, talking to no one in particular

Just trying to convince myself that I can change this

Not just myself

I'm wrong

Dead wrong

Dead as a mouse in a trap

Crushed, neck snapped

I can't pull myself up by my laces

No matter if they're my Chucks or my boots

It won't work

And you can't help

Best you can do is want this pill bug roll around in a space vast and great

The harder I try, the more I solidify

Cramping into my shell

My fellow bugs tell me to look up

At the sky, the sun, the birds

The predators and the prey

The April rains the buds of May

The ants and termites tell me how I can be a man

Scream out in my little bug voice

Recognize what I am

Then I can be something else

Once I die

Once I die

Once I die

Then I rise

As long as I direct my words in the correct direction

God, pick up my boot straps

Give me new shoes

Some that were meant for walking

The kind that bring good news

Not the kind that wander into dens and pits and pens

Not the ones that track in trash and muck

I'm stepping down

Off the box

And following someone else

A more in depth introduction to Max Bemis

A Very Short Introduction to Max Bemis

I love Max Bemis. Like bromance kind love... well, more like massive respect kind of love.

I don't know the man personally, but I do know him in that fake way that you feel like you kind of know celebrities... Twitter helps too. Anyway, Max is the lead singer of a band named "Say Anything." I heard about his band some years ago when they released their first album: "...Is a Real Boy." Once I found out that their first single was called "Wow... I Can Get Sexual Too" I was instantly turned off.

So I forgot about them for quite sometime. Years down the road I was listening to a lot of Eisley, a band from Texas composed of three sisters, their brother and a cousin. Their parents are their managers, and they were homeschooled Christians. Plus their music is just really cool.

Well, this past fall, I found out that the girl who plays lead guitar for Eisley married Max Bemis... the lead singer of Say Anything, and the bands were doing a tour together. "Why? Why???" I asked myself. Well, there was only one thing to do... figure out what she could see in a guy like Max Bemis. And I found plenty.

Right now Max is a nominally Messianic Jew, with suppressed bi-polar syndrome. He's a bit nuts. But his new album, "Self-titled," expressed how much he has changed since the release of his first album, "A Real Boy." It's a transition from self-loathing, drug addiction, rage, bitterness and lust to an attitude of thankfulness, penitence, love for his new wife, and the hope he has found in Christ.

What really cemented my respect for him however was an interweb incident that occurred last night that reflected my own missteps on the webernets. A Twitter post by Max took a jab at another band member from New Found Glory. A bit later, Max put up another post that was rather longer (read it here) that explained and apologized for his actions. Apparently one of the members of New Found Glory had written a song taking pot shots at Max's wife. That really sent him over the edge, but he felt like he ought to explain himself and apologize for getting angry in such a public way. Sound familiar?

He seems like one of the few celebrities that wants his fans to keep him accountable for what he does, and wants to explain himself when he does something that he thinks is justified. I want to support someone who does that. Especially someone who does that in the punk rock industry.

Yeah, he still swears... yeah, he's still a little rough around the edges... But wasn't the Apostle Paul?

JSTT

Herrrrmmm....

Perhaps I should retract what I said in my "singleness awareness day" post. Not sure. But for something that was bashing sentimentality... it sure did seem to be full of a lot of "feelings;" which as we all know can get you killed.

Pardon me while I try to figure out what I am trying to say.

Thanks,

JSTT

God Works in Mysterious Ways

God works in mysterious ways. Example? My roommate, Jeff, who is an absolute bike nut is now making jewelry instead of fixing bikes... which he was trying to make money doing at the beginning of this year.

How about me? The movie nut? Yeah, well, again... at the beginning of this academic year that's what I was doing: making movies. But stuff started falling through, and now what am I doing for money? Making wine.

Who would have guessed? The story never turns out like you think it will.

JSTT

Singleness Awareness Day

Valentines Day... is there an apostrophe in there? Well, I submit that there shouldn't be... since it's not Valentine's Day anymore (a holiday remembering the patron saint), it really is "valentines" Day, the day that you go out and get "valentines" plural... not possessive. Who knew you could come up with this huge argument with a simple change in punctuation?

It's raining... raining in the Idaho panhandle. It's snowing everywhere else... I think it might even be snowing in Florida right now. Nothing would surprise me weather wise at this point. Perhaps this is why the official term has been changed from "global warming" to "climate change." Notice that "climate change" is a bad thing. Obama said so in his state of the union address. Also notice what follows from that: not even Obama believes that all change is good. Bush was smart but talked dumb, Obama is dumb but talks smart. Which is more dangerous?

It's raining... depending on the kind of mood I'm in... I quite enjoy rain. Especially right now... at the end of a very, very long week. The roommates are out partying it up. The house is quiet, nothing but the water heater whirring in the background. "Be still and know that I am God." I'll probably take a nap soon. THIS is how to spend a Sunday afternoon.

I have a job... this makes me very happy. It really makes me focus on my school work when I have the time. I think I did pretty well on my science midterm... I've failed my last two. Maybe I can pull my average grade up from a C to a B this quarter. You never know. Last year 3rd quarter proved to be the best.

Already making summer plans... my long lost roommate, Russell invited me up to his place this August for Warped Tour. I went last year, but it was a total bore going alone. Rocking out with a friend is always so much more fun. As for the rest of this summer? Who knows? Well... God does. He always has. I keep thinking He doesn't. How silly of me. As me and my college friends often say in instant message speak: *headdesk*

Singleness awareness day... I think I won't even celebrate it when I'm married. That will be a tough one to spring on the wife. "Sorry dear, I don't believe in Valentines Day." I think I have a legitimate excuse though. Paul makes it very clear in his letters to the churches around the world that they ought not do anything that would make a weaker brother to stumble. I think our famous American red holiday does just that. Let me explain... no, there is too much...... let me sum up:

I was very prone to... seeking others' affections while in middle school, high school... and to some extent even now. I consider myself one of the afore mentioned "weaker brothers." Valentines Day always bothered me, it put pressures on me that needn't have been there. So, even when I am no longer single... I will nullify "valentines" day in my household.

Romans 14:5-6 "One man considers one day more sacred than another; another man considers every day alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind. He who regards one day as special, does so to the Lord. He who eats meat, eats to the Lord, for he gives thanks to God; and he who abstains, does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God."

I'm fully convinced in my own mind, and I will not celebrate "valentines" day unto the Lord.

In Christ,

JSTT

Apology II

Well, that was interesting…

So, the thing about who I am and the modern invention of the webernet is that you all get to see the good and the bad. I think that on a fundamental level that’s important. But I don’t want you all to get the wrong idea.

For all those who may read this that I don’t know, I’m not a guy that just randomly flies off the handle at 8^th century monks. In retrospect, a line from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix comes to mind: “I just get so angry all the time!” That’s how I was feeling the other day. But as Sirius Black responds to Harry as he is wondering he is really evil, he comes very close to quoting Batman: “It’s is what we do that defines us.” (for the record, this is VERY characteristic of me, quoting movies to get my point across.)

I want what I do to have meaning and purpose. I want to really get angry about stuff sometimes, but not arbitrarily. I want to let people know what I am passionate about, but taking it out on monks that many people have never heard of before is just not how to do it.

As a little aside, I really want to get my motto tattooed on my right forearm. Just three words: “Truth With Love.” If nothing else, I want to have the reminder emblazoned upon my skin, so that everytime I see it, it will become engraven in my soul. Now that I think on it… THAT is what I am most passionate about! “Truth with love.” There is so much in the Scriptures that I want to convey and tell others, and there is so much hate spreading through the modern American church. It’s either tolerance or passivism. (I’m not saying that this is EVERYONE, but by and large it is the norm.) The two camps of love and truth are seemingly engaged in an endless war. But they are not mutually exclusive. Nor should you only have one or the other. If you are all fire and brimstone, no one will listen to the truth you have. And if you are all sappy, sweet mush… you have no truth to speak to those that are listening.

So that is more likely something I should swear about… not old British monks. Please forgive me. Which causes are worth fighting for the kingdom? I’m still working on that one. Please bear with me as I learn what hills are worth dying on.

Many thanks,

JSTT

Playlist of the Week 2010 #6

-"Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You" - Muse http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BrBNfXIBqu4

-"Skin and Bones" - Motion City Soundtrack http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJFYGtUOVwY

-"The Breakfast Song" - Annie http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giggj5rQbBc

-"Perfect Situation" - Weezer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WgR-l3fhygw

-"World Behind Your Wall" - Tokio Hotel http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlLkscjDWsA&feature=channel

-"Have Faith In Me" - A Day to Remember http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2YSkdpqJQlc

-"The Last Song" - The All-American Rejects http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJB2vgyBvlw

New Frontier

Ok... so there are a lot of things that scare me about having a job. Let's start with the fact that I have not had a job in about 2 years since I left Virginia Beach Alcohol Beverage Control back in 2008 when I moved down to NC and then out to college. That's right... I have not had a job in 2 years. I suppose this reflects on the grace of God, as I have not HAD to have a job to support myself. But the time came this year for me to enter the working world. It wasn't a new year's resolution or anything like that (although, 2010 DOES begin and new chapter and new story), but it was more the fact that I am almost 21, and have no real work experience.

That brings me to the next thing that scares me about having a job: I haven't HAD a real job before! I've "worked," yes... but not regular kind of normal person job. Well, I did do the classic mow your lawn, watch the mentally insane 3 year old boy jobs. (Andrew was crazy, and I loved him for it. But that's a story for another time.) But after that, I decided to work at a place called River Ranch Retreat Ranch (I kid you not), more commonly referred to as "Triple R Ranch," perhaps because it was less harsh on the ears and sensibilities. It was a Christian summer camp, the kids that attended it were not. I babysat 12 prepubescent boys for a week at a time for 4 weeks with the help of another college aged guy. It was... fun?

My next job was as an underage buyer for Alcohol Beverage Control (ABC). My dad found that job for me; to this day I don't know how he dug it up. Perhaps he will comment on this post and enlighten us all. Basically, I had to fill out several reams of paper (as it was a government job), and then sit in for training at a police station. Once I was hired my job consisted of going around, trying to buy alcohol from any place that would sell it, with two armed police officers trailing me. We were all undercover, so if the establishment handled themselves well, asked for my ID and refused to sell to me, we walked out and no one was the wiser. If you sold to me however, the officers would immediately walk up to you, tell you what you did, tell the manager what you did and then tell the state what you did. Then they'd arrest you, which I learned working this job does NOT actually mean that you get put in cuffs. It just means... well, I'm not sure anymore. But anyway, you were caught red handed and you would have to show up at court. (I got to tag along as a witness when we did catch someone.) Usually anyone we busted would either get a 500 dollar fine, community service or some kind of combination of the two.

There are so many tales I could tell about that job: the time an ABC agent got called in to do a drug bust in this pink polo. How the agents would try to make me look as young as possible so I wouldn't get sold to; cuz if I did, they'd be stuck with miles of paper work. How often Food Lion sold me alcohol. How we had to drive through the projects... the list goes on.

The next "job" I had was as an actor and creative person in a local film company. Never saw a dime of profit... but I think we gained capital in other areas. The relationships forged were always the big focus for me. We made a movie that still isn't finished, and the company kind of blew up at the end of last year... but I don't regret any of it. Sometimes an adventure is worth taking just for the fun of it.

Back to the new job:

Another thing that kind of bothers me is that I am not good with liquids, and I am going to be working at a winery... During high school I joked with my friends that I had a drinking problem. (Not alcoholic drinking problem... but that leads into reason 3.) The insident that I remember specifically was when I was at a party at my best friend's house. I had a big glass of Sprite in my hand, and was standing behind the couch where some of our other friends were playing Nintendo. Then, inexplicably, I kind of drop, kind of throw my fizzy drink of goodness all over my friend's couch. We laughed it off afterwards, but that still didn't alleviate my drinking problem. How bad am I going to be around wine bottles all day??

Of course, although I will be soon, I am not yet 21. Obviously that means I cannot be a taster at the winery. I can see myself now:

"Sir, what wine would you recommend?"

"Ummm... That one!"

"Oh? How is it??"

"Good... we make it."

"What's it taste like?"

"No idea..."

Even more than that, I am a full time student, at the school with the craziest work load this side of the Mississippi. I have already had to tell my teacher I won't be able to make one of my classes on Monday. Now, I have just found out that my new work schedule directly conflicts with two of my finals in about 4 weeks.

But the biggest one? Taxes, taxes, taxes... *twitch, twitch* I think the federal government is trying to drive us mad or something. Everytime I see a W-4 form I start to have minor heart attacks.

But you know what? I just realized... all this (although amusing perhaps) is worry. Clearly a sin in the Bible. God saw fit to grant me a job. I am immensely thankful for it. Do I want God to take away the gift that He just gave me? No. I'll practice being thankful instead of bothered.

Cheers, and have a blessed Sabbath!

JSTT

Follow the String

I'm running trying to catch up as things change
As things die
As people move in and out
As we lie
It's like reaching for an ice cream cone only to have it fall upon the pavement
It's like trying to climb the stairs to the attic, then falling into the basement
I keep coming up with abstractions that don't do reality justice
Bang the gavel, send me away, lock me up so I won't write anymore angsty metaphors
But even from my cell, I see the world keep moving
The changing of the guard reflects something deeper
Something larger at stake
It's telling me that we made a mistake
I clutch the string and follow it to the end
It takes me to an unexpected destination
I thought it was saving me from damnation
I thought I was running from what I feared
Only to find that I am right back where I began
Except everything is different
Perhaps it's only that I was wrong...
Again
Awash in a sea of pretty faces, taking notes, staring into space, longing for better places
Longing for something else
Longing for a local where we'll never change again
Cuz there'll be no need
We'll already be perfect

Playlist of the week 2010 #5

- BT - "These Hopeful Machines" http://www.myspace.com/btnetwork

Just listen to the whole album... yes, all two hours of it. I highly doubt that you will regret it. This is the best album I have heard in a looooooooong time. And I listen to lots of music!

Cheers!
JSTT

Rain

If there is one thing that I miss about the northwest... it is water. Really big water. There is so much contained in water. I think often times that it is the closest thing we have to a perfect metaphor for God. It is essential. It is powerful. It is everywhere. We die without it. We can be killed with it in a million different equally horrifying ways. We love it. We are terrified by it.

So now, out here in Idaho there is so little of it. We get bits of it in snow, but for some reason that just isn't good enough for me. I want more. I want oceans of the stuff. Torrential down pours. Endless waves pounding a rhythmic time upon the shore. Hurricanes even!

But here there is none of that. Not rain, not storm, not sea. I feel kind of like I am drying up.

My brain quotes pithy sayings in retort to my complaints. "Grow where you're planted."

Am I looking for the wrong kind of water? Am I neglecting the water of my baptism? The water of the Spirit? Where is it? Have I hidden it deep in my heart? In the deep crevices, that nothing can penetrate? Have I buried the water of hope and love and peace so deep that I am actually having trouble drinking from the well?

Dear Lord, I can't dig anymore. I am parched, I am longing for something more than a pill to get me through the day. I need something that lasts... forever. You've given it to me already, but I keep losing it. Totally my fault. I seem to be so horrible at water retention. Plug up the holes, please God. I don't want to leak anymore. Keep me filled with your grace, and the pure joy that comes not of circumstances... but of You.

Amen
&
Amen!

JSTT

Welcome to Nerdsville

We have our own language. We really do. If any of you sane folk walked into our movie watching parties, you would probably walk right back out. "They're speaking Klingon! I swear!" Of course, there is no need for swearing; that is entirely inappropriate in this instance.

Things like: "He would get along really well with Hal 9000!" To which I respond: "Oh, you just wait an see." "Those models remind me of Star Wars." "Why do people keep falling apart in movies this year?" "That was TOTALLY like Alien!" "2009 was recorded as having the most vomiting in movies for any given year."

It's not like we care. We're... fellowshipping. I think that is one of those things that people often miss, especially with nerdy guys. We are having a blast. This is how we interact. We actually make memories that we will remember years from now. Case and point: I still remember making fun of "Babette's Feast" and the vampire olives. That was over a year ago. Still a fond memory.

So next time you see a bunch of us walking around, talking gibberish, don't pity us, don't laugh at us. Laugh WITH us! Or perhaps... pity yourself, and that fact that you don't have friends that will laugh with you. I'm blessed. I wouldn't see it any other way.

Sincerely,
JSTT

Wait

Waiting...
What are we waiting on?
A sign?
A hope?
A wish?
A fish, I could swim
Just swim away
Stop the madness and the pain
But I'm looking at this upside down
We aren't passive like bricks
Only used to beat down other walls
We move
We act
We wait with purpose
We wait with passion
We wait

Update & LOL @ Obama

The Favorite Albums of All Time post has now been completed.








And here's a little tidbit for your enjoyment and edification (funny bit is at the 4:48 minute mark):



Have a great weekend!
JSTT

Playlist of the week 2010 #4

Ok, I lied. I DO have more awesome music for you. Sorry about all the posts about music. I'll try to get back to original writings in a little while.

-"Quiet Dog" - Mos Def http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TuwVP1WoIhg
-"You Know My Name" - Chris Cornell http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxAm8Y1w6BI
-"Dirty Harry" - Gorillaz http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALKt_yjjB0s
-"I've Been Everywhere" - Johnny Cash http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MmFN9C9PVpg
-"Every Other Way" - BT http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4qZzBHnwUk
-"Bulletproof" - La Roux http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9cXLFk65y4
-"Danny Boy" - Harry Connick, Jr. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GOTq0NEkQU (song starts about 2 minutes in)
-"You Made It" - DJ Shadow and Chris James http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3o1T6JALbY

My All Time Favorite Albums

Ok, I don't have any great new music for you this week, at least in terms of what is new and fresh and was released just yesterday. But I would like to share with you the albums that have shaped me and my musical tastes. Spanning 8 years and every genre from jazz to punk to psalms. While there are a lot of albums that I really enjoy and could listen to on repeat for days on end, not all of those have really changed me, and not all of them really work as an ALBUM. They don't tell a complete story. These ones here, however, are the albums that I will ALWAYS listen to.


Yellowcard - "Paper Walls"
















One of the few albums from my college years that made the list. I was a big fan of Yellowcard's second album, "Lights & Sounds." But that record was a bit dark, sometimes ranting against the war in the Middle East ("Two Weeks From Twenty"), other times commenting on the confusion of relationships ("Gray"). "Paper Walls," however, took a turn for the better; much better. The lead single, "Light Up The Sky," makes the movement towards optimism very obvious, while the theme of breaking out of the "paper house" we've built for ourselves pervades the album.

Stand out tracks: "Light Up The Sky," "Shadows and Regrets" and "Dear Bobbie"




Thousand Foot Krutch - "Phenomenon"
















Already being a pretty big fan of Linkin Park, and looking for Christian alternatives to the sounds of secular bands I liked, Thousand Foot Krutch (TFK) immediately appealed to me. Mixing rapcore and hard edged grunge, the album had a crunching impact like few albums I had heard before. I kept it on repeat for weeks. Low on content, but high on the fun factor, this album still makes me happy and reminds me of my middle school days.

Stand out tracks: "This Is A Call," "New Design" and "Bounce"




Project 86 - "Truthless Heroes"
















When I first picked up this album, I don't think I had ever heard anything quite so angry before. And the more I listened to it, and the older I grew, I realized I had not heard many albums quite so on target. The first and last album that Project 86 ever made with a major record label, the angst is through the roof. The lead singer, Andrew Schwab, levels criticism at everyone from Hollywood to the modern evangelical church. Who says that Christians can't stick it to the man too?

Stand out tracks: "S.M.C.," "Another Boredom Movement" and "Soma"




The O.C. Supertones - "Hi-Fi Revival"
















Along with "Lift" and "Building a Better Me," this was one of the first albums that I ever bought, and greatly influenced my tastes for quite some time. The Supertones, sick of the angst and hatred in rock music, were out to make something fun, clean, and that your pastor would approve of. Well, they succeeded... in spades. And yes, that's a good thing. While many other Christian rock acts sought to simply copy/clean/paste what the secular music industry was doing, the Supertones made something new. Utilizing a horn section with huge rock beats, they made a praise and worship album and a punk album at the same time. Positive, energetic, and in the end, exhausting; it is totally worth every penny. Don't worry, it's that good exhausted feeling you get after a hearty belly laugh, or a good run.

Stand out tracks: "Go Go Go," "Just a Man" and "Glory Hallelujah"




Mae - "The Everglow"
















One of those rare albums that really does take you on a journey, that tells a story. You can't really listen to one of the songs from this album, it's meant to be listened to as a whole... with the beautiful watercolor paintings in the artwork. If you do end up buying this album, make sure you buy a physical copy, or you will be missing half of the experience.

Stand out tracks: Just listen to the whole album.





The Gabe Dixon Band - "The Gabe Dixon Band"
















For a sound this deep, it's hard to imagine that it's only three guys with a drum kit, piano and upright bass. But there you have it. Soulful, moving white boy blues and jazz. I don't really have much to say about the album, except that the single "All Will Be Well" is my favorite song of all time, and has been for the past 9 years.

Stand out tracks: "All Will Be Well," "And The World Turned" and "Baby Doll"





Audio Adrenaline - "Lift"
















Audio A. truly was the U2 of the Christian music world. Boasting an enormous fan base, and having one of the best live shows around helped. Creating this album helped even more. They even created "The Hands and Feet" project, not unlike U2's "One" campaign... from a Christian worldview, of course. Audio A. only put out two other albums after "Lift," due to lead vocalist Mark Stuart's tearing vocal cords, but "Lift" is by far (in my opinion) one of their best.

Stand out tracks: "Ocean Floor," "Summertime" and "Tremble"





Good Charlotte - "The Young and the Hopeless"
















High school is confusing. Who do you listen to? What do you listen to? There are so many ideas competing for your attention that often times it seems a lot easier to block it all out, maybe even give up. The boy's from D.C.'s Good Charlotte aren't about to let that happen. Blending satire with perseverance, they touch on everything from suicide, to jealousy, to materialism. Life is hard, reconciliation is hard, but "The Young and the Hopeless" wants you to know that it's not nearly as hopeless as it seems.

Stand out tracks: "The Anthem," "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous" and "Movin' On"





Audioslave - "Audioslave"
















After Rage Against the Machine's rapping madman Zack de la Rocha left the band, Chris Cornell (former lead singer of the 80's grunge outfit Soundgarden) took the reins, and took the band in a completely different direction. It became much less angry, and the lyrics improved greatly, while maintaining the guitar magic of Tom Morello. Audioslave introduced grunge to a whole new generation and catapulted Cornell to a near legendary position in the world of rock and roll.

Stand out tracks: "Show Me How To Live," "Like a Stone" and "Exploder"





Dogwood - "Building a Better Me"
















Punk is my favorite genre simply because it was the first kind of music that I found. I don't really remember how, but there you have it. It started with the early days of Tooth and Nail Records and MP3.com... when it still legally offered free mp3s; before most people knew what music piracy was. It was back then, early 2001, that I discovered Dogwood... one of the original Christian punk rock bands from So Cal, who along with MxPx and Slick Shoes spearheaded the movement. Blending skateboard culture and heart on the sleeve Christianity, they created a hardcore blend that Tooth and Nail nearly put a trademark on... paving the way for bands like Under0ath and Kutless. But let it be known, Dogwood started it all. To this day, their "Building A Better Me" video makes me smile.

Stand out tracks: "Building A Better Me," "Truth About It Is" and "Nothing New"







Foo Fighters - "Echoes, Silence, Patience and Grace"
















Yet another example of a rock supergroup that became a respected band in their own right. Their last album came out just as I was finishing up high school and spoke to me on a very deep level, specifically the last track, "Home." We all long for home, whatever form that may take... and Foo Fighters take you on a trip through a summer in the south eastern U.S. to find that home. Darned if they don't do a good job.

Stand out tracks: "The Pretender," "Summer's End" and "Home"





The Classic Crime - "The Silver Cord"
















The Classic Crime's "The Silver Cord" is the winter to "Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace's" summer. It takes you to the other side of the continent, to a cold and bleak Washington state, as the singer searches for meaning, hope and (like David Grohl) a home. He finds it. He finds that peace and solace in only one place: complete and totally surrender to Christ.

Stand out tracks: "Salt In The Snow," "Everything" and "The Beginning"




Entire Relient K catalog
















Just like my parents and Christ, Relient K has always been their for me. When I got back from Peru, right after discovering rock and roll, girls and Christian culture... there they were with "Two Lefts..." Entering high school, dealing with broken relationships and looking for hope, they released their major label debut: "Mmhmm." "Five Score..." was bigger, louder, fuller, and ended with an 11 minute epic that made my mom cry. Well into my college career, they put out "Forget and Not Slow Down," reminding me that people fail us, but God does not... and He is what makes life worth living. He is the only one in whom I can find my identity. Relient K has grown up alongside me, and I and deeply thankful to them for the stories they've told and the encouragement they've given me.

Stand out tracks: "For The Moments I Feel Faint," "Breakdown," "Mood Rings," "Trademark," "Getting Into You," "High of 75," "I So Hate Consequences," "More Than Useless," "Up and Up," "Deathbed," "I Don't Need A Soul," "Savannah" and "This Is The End (If You Want It)"




THESE NEXT THREE ALBUMS ARE MY TOP TOP FAVORITES. I OFTEN LISTEN TO THEM ALL IN TANDEM. I WON'T BE GIVING YOU A STAND OUT TRACK LIST FOR ANY OF THEM EITHER. THEY ARE ALL AMAZING AND MEANT TO BE LISTENED TO AS COMPLETE ALBUMS.



Fernando Ortega - "The Shadow of Your Wings"
















When I'm down and out, when there is no other direction to look but up... I pull out this album. It reminds me who I am, and where, ultimately, my hope lies. Completely composed of Psalms and hymns, it's all scripture. It's Scripture with music. David, a shepherd several thousand years ago did something similar. He was able to calm a king down, a king who was crazier than a sack of ferrets. The word of God brings peace, the word of God set to music... need I say more?






Rise Against - "The Sufferer and the Witness"
















It's hard to find a secular band that really takes justice seriously, who really wants to do the right thing, and has a purpose. Avoiding the stereotypical "sex, drugs and rock and roll" image, Rise Against stands out amongst a crowd. Most of the members of the band are married, believe in the sanctity of marriage, refuse to smoke or drink, and generally shun most of the vices of the rock and roll world they live in. But they don't skimp on the rock. Righteous anger, redemption and perseverance are pervasive themes on the album. "Injection" calls out for to God for help and deliverance from addiction, "Prayer of the Refuge" sings of hope and longs for justice for the downtrodden, "The Good Left Undone" begs for salvation, "Bricks" is just plan angry and "Survive" lets you know that it sure as hell isn't over yet.




Steven Curtis Chapman - "Declaration"
















The most influential album in my life. My mom listened to Steven Curtis Chapman when she was in college, and now I'm in college and I am still listening to him... even though I was introduced to him long before any of the other bands or musicians in this list. It is very probable that I listened to music by Steven Curtis Chapman while still in the womb. And this album has lifted me up more times than I can count. It has made me laugh, it has made me cry, it has caused me to worship our Lord more than ever before. And it has always reminded me that "God is God."



Cheers,
JSTT